Okay, some friends talked me in to going to see this movie, and the only reason I actually went was to see Paris Hilton die. On that front, this movie was a brilliant success; she died in a most satisfying way. On everything else, the movie failed. It was predictable, the acting was poor, everything was just plain old recycled Hollywood-horror movie clichés, without the intentional campy-factor that could have saved it.

Let's see, group of young kids go on road trip, camp in the wilderness, piss-off creepy local in old truck, get stuck, and are subsequently killed by said local. Yeah, real original guys. Then there's the movie's namesake, the house. The House of Wax. The house, that is actually made of actual wax. On a little side note, let me just confess that I'm usually very good at the whole willing-suspension-of-disbelief thing, I usually get mocked for believing too many wild elements from movies. That being said, a house that is made of wax WOULD FREAKING MELT!! It's in Louisiana, with the sun bearing down on it day after day. And it's not some super hard waxy-like substance, one character could scratch it with their fingernail.

So what are the good parts of the movie? Well, as previously mentioned, Paris Hilton gets killed. Yup, that's about it. So who can we blame for this atrocity? Writer Carey Hayes hasn't had a great career, it's been mostly filled with poorly received TV movies. But the real (lack of) brains behind the operation is Jaume Collet-Serra, a veteran director of music videos and commercials, which he should stick to. Apparently Jaume's chose Paris for her role first, without even having her audition, and built rest of the cast around her. If that's not a recipe for disaster, I don't know what is.

Starring: Elisha Cuthbert, Chad Michael Murray, Brian Van Holt, Paris Hilton, Jared Padalecki, Jon Abrahams, Robert Ri'chard